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The first time I flew to India, I remember peering out into the midnight blackness as we descended into the Delhi airport. All I could see were random groupings of flickering yellow lights on the ground far below, and I realized I had no idea what to expect. It was my “holy shit” moment. There was no turning back.
I had planned my trip for a year: saved money, left my apartment, put everything in storage and lept. Six months of criss-crossing the sub-continent by myself. Though I had traveled frequently in the past, to Europe, Japan, Thailand, Australia and Central America, I had never been to a place like India.
All I knew about India was what I read, saw in the movies and heard from others. Like many travelers before me, I was told many tall tales about the challenges of travel in India: the crowds, the heat, the delays, the con men and the poverty.
Now that I travel frequently to India, I often find myself in conversations with people who have never been, and who are both fascinated and hesitant. The most common comment I get is:
“I would love to go, but I’m too afraid to face the poverty.” Or:
“I could never go to a poor country like that.”
I usually don’t say anything, but the truth is, I don’t understand this response.
Whether you go and actually see the poverty of India up close, it will be there nonetheless. Every night as you fall asleep in your warm, comfortable and safe bed in North America, thousands, even millions, of people are waking up on the sidewalks of Delhi, Mumbai and Kolkata. Whether you go or not will not prevent this from happening.
Whether you choose to experience the misery to which the human condition can descend or not, these people are still your brother and sisters. We all occupy the same planet, the same mother earth. Your responsibility to your fellow global citizens is the same, whether you actually meet them all or not.
Your visit to the slums of Mumbai will probably not save anyone from a life of poverty; it will probably not change anyone’s life – except your own.
I’m a middle class woman from Canada who has traveled for a total of 11 months in India, and I have seen some sights I never thought I would see. On the grounds of my hotel in Chennai, I saw a city worker naked, except for a tiny loincloth, crawl out of a sewer, completely covered in shit. Some of it was probably mine. He was fixing my hotel’s sewer system.
I’ve seen tiny children selling flowers on the ghats in Varanasi; whole families living on the side of the road in Delhi; streets filled with people with leprosy in Dharamsala.
Yes, it’s hard to see; yes, it’s heartbreaking; yes, I wish I could do something about all of it. But I’m clear that I can’t save the world, and that’s what allows me to experience these things without too much agony.
Knowing that I can’t save anyone, and knowing that this poverty is happening despite the fact that I live in a middle-class bubble where I am immured from it, I feel the one thing I can do is raise my awareness about it. I feel it is my responsibility as a global citizen to leave my middle-class, North American life and see how the other 90% of the world lives.
My trips to India haven’t changed the world, but they have changed me. I have a greater appreciation for the materially rich life I was born into in Canada; I have a much broader perspective on the world and my place in it; I have developed a stronger sense of spiritual awareness; I have been surprised and, above all else, I have been humbled.
We in the West tend to think that money buys happiness, but India teaches otherwise. I have seen more generous gestures among the poor of India than the rich of North America. I have seen an old man share his one-chapati lunch with a cow on the bridge in Rishikesh. I have seen rural Rajasthani women walk with the grace and elegance of queens, jugs of water balanced precipitously on their heads. Just because these people are poor in material wealth, does not mean they are poor in spirit.
If you go to India after all, you may find that it is the joy that hurts, not the misery.
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19 Comments... join the discussion!
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Lovely, honest, humble post. Great details. This line made me smile: “I have seen an old man share his one-chapati lunch with a cow on the bridge in Rishikesh.”
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“If you go to India after all, you may find that it is the joy that hurts, not the misery.” Beautiful. I really enjoyed this.
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Well said.
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It makes me sad to read things like your statement, “Knowing I can’t save anyone…” You believe that the “only thing” you can do is raise your awareness, which is actually a really powerful thing. In raising your awareness, you raise others’ awareness (such as every person who reads this article), and who knows what comes of it? We never know just how far our influence might reach.
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Gorgeous writing, really well done.
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Thank you for sharing. I agree.. we had been to India a few years ago but only to the South. We hesitated going back with our two kids now a little older ( 9 and 8). We deicded to give it a try and just spent two weeks during X’mas and New Year in MP and Rajasthan…. We loved it and the boys still talk about it. It was really hard experiencing people on the streets, poverty and filth but then it might have given them (and us) a different perspective on our ‘golden cage” life here in Northern Europe. I am sure we will be back…
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Beautiful piece, really well done. India is an amazing place but the poverty is all around, as it the beauty. Really enjoyed your descriptions of your journey and your thoughts. Makes me want to head back to India right away.
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What a great article. I, myself, have this experience many times. As I say in my book – similar to what Mariellen beautifully expresses here – the poverty and hardships remain whether we choose to look at them or not. For me personally, it’s unforgivable for me to look away just because it’s too “difficult.” Especially for those of us who are so blessed. And as Abbie mentioned, simply having awareness, simply being willing to interact and actually share the common experience of humanity with people in such circumstances makes the cultural connections of the world so much richer.
This article is MUST reading for any traveler to virtually any corner of the globe.
Shelley↵ -
What a great article. I, myself, have this experience many times. As I say in my book – similar to what Mariellen beautifully expresses here – the poverty and hardships remain whether we choose to look at them or not. For me personally, it’s unforgivable for me to look away just because it’s too “difficult.” Especially for those of us who are so blessed. And as Abbie mentioned, simply having awareness, simply being willing to interact and actually share the common experience of humanity with people in such circumstances makes the cultural connections of the world so much richer.
Mariellen writes that her trips to India haven’t changed the world, but they have changed her. I beg to differ. This IS how the world is changed – when each of us, as individuals, are changed. This article is MUST reading for any traveler to virtually any corner of the globe.
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I hope you are not simply ignoring the problems of poverty. You go to India, stay is ashrams, take rickshaws and allow the experience to change your perspective.. but what about doing a little something to change someone’s life? It seems India has given you so much, what have you given back to her? It doesn’t have to be career or lifetime commitment, but I hope travelers do something that at least temporarily aids someone else’s life. Not just in India or developing countries, but all places you travel and live, including home.
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Thanks for comments, everyone. I really appreciate that you took the time to read this article and comment thoughtfully. I feel it shows that “global consciousness’ is really increasing.
To answer your point, Amanda, I have volunteered in India (I spent a month in Dharamsala working as an art therapist with Tibetan refugee children — you can read about my experiences here on my friend’s blog: http://theplanetd.com/giving-back-in-india-with-art-refuge).
I loved the volunteer experience and I will probably do it again, but I am a writer, and I feel I can do my part best through my writing. Everyone has different and unique gifts to offer, and I think the best thing you can do for yourself and the planet is to find out what YOURs is, and do it.
Cheers, Mariellen
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Why is it that you can’t change the world? I don’t think your giving enough credit to yourself or the individual. I hope to God that if I ever go to India that it’s not just my life that’s changed because of it.
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Great piece. It can be overwhelming to think of the big picture.
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Wow, a beautifully written, raw and honest post. We have just left India or a break. We will be going back in one month while we recharge in Sri Lanka. At times we loved India and at times we hated it. Your article makes me rethink my opinions of it near the end of our two months there.
I couldn’t get passed the filth and disgust. But I remember talking to my husband Dave about this and we took note that we can leave any time we want to. The people that live there, don’t have a choice. They have to live like that everyday and it is heartbreaking.
We met some incredible people in India and some not so incredible. But we are looking forward to going back. We are lucky. We have the opportunity to leave for awhile when things get tough.
Our problem is that we stayed on the well beaten tourist path I think. When we go back, we will be through all of that stuff and on to more exciting destinations where we will be able to meet real people and not only the people that are only out to make a buck off of the tourists.↵ -
I am so humbled by your writing. Thank you, thank you for writing this. And I say this less as an Indian, and more as a traveller.
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I live in the Philippines and I’ve had the same “I don’t want go because it’s poor area” kind of attitude before I went on a required immersion trip to a poor mountain area with minority groups. I wasn’t open to the idea because I was so used to the comforts of my own home. I didn’t want to leave that comfort, but it was either to do it or to fail my course. I’m glad I did it. It was the most humbling experience I’ve ever had in my short-lived life and I would gladly do it again. The people I met and the experiences that I’ve gained is truly worthwhile.
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Great article and very true that it is filthy and dirty but there are people who can teach us how to live happily without having money.
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I’ve only been abroad once to Italy 3 years ago and now that I’m graduating from college I’ve been waiting to see what IS in this world. “If you go to India after all, you may find that it is the joy that hurts, not the misery.” Well spoken.
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