Standing atop Cerro Tunari, Cochabamba / Photo: foxtwo
Whether you’ve arranged a volunteer gig at Villa Tunari’s wildlife refuge or just plan on bummin’ it up on the La Paz-Uyuni-Sucre circuit, here are some things to keep in mind about South America’s underdog.
It’s pronounced “Bs.”
We’re talking currency here—the Boliviano—and every English-speaking foreigner you meet is gonna use the term.
Photo: jaytkendall
You might think it sounds pretentious at first. You might even take a silent vow: “There’s no way I’m jumping on that bandwagon.”
So you’ll struggle by with the clunky “Boliviano” for a bit. Or do as many locals and call it a peso.
But before long you’ll come around—they all do—chiming in with the rest: “I just bought a bag of 25 oranges for only 4 Bs!”
Every outlet sparks.
“Yikes!” I said the first time I plugged in my laptop, meeting a loud pop and two very large, very golden sparks.
“Don’t worry,” a roommate returned. “They all do that.” And it’s true.
So, no, you haven’t fried your MacBook. You’re just in Bolivia.
Bus rides can get hairy.
This may go without saying in a country that’s home to the World’s Most Dangerous Road, but for a while I was fooled.
Some major highways are paved, and the buses running them could even be mistaken for luxurious once in a while.
Photo: zaturno
But venture off the primary trucking routes and things get ugly fast.
Before you know it, you’ll be having your own “Bolivian bus experience”—the one where you can’t tell if your teeth are chattering from the crap road or the drafty window, the chola who took up residence in the aisle three hours ago has fallen asleep with her bowler-hatted head on your thigh, and the bus breaks down—right on cue—in the middle of a frigid Altiplano night.
Fun stories afterwards—not so fun while you’re there.
Spanish isn’t just your second language.
In many parts of South America’s most “indigenous” nation, the long arm of castellano has yet to reach—or maybe was amputated due to frostbite.
If you’re heading deep into the jungle or off the beaten path on the Altiplano, your halting Spanish isn’t going to be the biggest language barrier you face.
Aymara and Quechua are two native tongues that, along with Spanish, are recognized as official, but there are about 35 others in varying degrees of use.
Photo: Aya Padron
Prepare to get high.
Even if you don’t stop into the cocaine bar.
La Paz is at 3,660 meters (12,000 feet) above sea level. If you take on the Southwest Circuit, you’ll be even higher.
It’s easy to brush off the potential effects of soroche before you arrive, but it hits the majority of visitors in one way or another.
Remember to follow the local advice: “Camina lentito, come poquito, duerme solito.” (Walk slowly, eat lightly, sleep by your lonesome.)
Sometimes, Internet lines “blow up.”
“Why’s the Internet down?” I asked the director of my volunteer program one day.
“I just called the company,” he replied. “They said a broadband transmission line somewhere in the Amazon blew up.”
“…Oh.”
The story wasn’t confirmed, and probably never happened. But the fact is, in Bolivia, it could have been true.
There are no McDonald’s. No Starbucks.
Photo: RastaChango
If all of the above has transpired and you’re longing for a taste of home—too bad. There are no golden arches, no green…whatevers, to provide the fix. Maybe a Burger King if you’re lucky.
But hey, suck it up. Run down the street to the market, pick up a handful of paltas to make guacamole, some llama steaks for the grill, and a few liters of Taquiña to wash it down. Come on, it’ll run ya like 30 Bs.
Life is good. You’re in Bolivia.
Community Connection
For more news out of Bolivia, check out these Matador titles:
Big Bolivian Sunsets: Interview with Photographer Ron Dubin
Bolivia to Become World Battery Capital?
The Bolivian Referendum: Watershed Moment or Politics as Usual?
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18 Comments... join the discussion!
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Love it, Hal! I’ve so been there with the Bolivian bus experience. Mine involved a breakdown in -where else?- the altiplano, and all the men getting out to push the bus through the mud. This took somewhere between two to three hours, during which time pretty much everyone in the bus took a communal pee I won’t soon forget.
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That cinches it. I’m going! I can’t wait to not see any green whatevers.
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And singani to drink, and more types of potatoes than you know what to do with, and don’t worry, they’re supposed to be black/brown/beige. Don’t forget to pick up a llama fetus in the witchcraft market in La Paz. Or on second thought, do. Totally do.
Loved this! Hope you’re getting better weather out of Patagonia. I know you are!
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Thanks Eileen. I’ve made it to Buenos Aires, and the weather is…rainy.
Just for today though.Those Bolivian potatoes are something else, no? How many hundreds or thousands of varieties are there?
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I like this cause these are the little things that you don’t know unless you have lived it. Great post, you got my feet itchy!
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Nice post, Hal, love the detail. I’m hoping like heck to visit the Dragons andes and amazon programnext year…it’s based out of Sorata.
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Love it…when you describe things that most people in the developed world wouldn’t be able to stand, and look fondly upon them, you know that place has earned a special place in your heart!
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So…how many Bs for a flight there?!
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More than you’d guess, unfortunately. It ain’t easy flying into the highest international airport in the world!
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Great post. Sounds like fun; think I’ll go grab a beer !
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Very enjoyable article, raises my interest in visiting this fascinating country. The only real suggestion I have on the article would be to change “So, no, you haven’t fried your MacBook” to “So, no, you haven’t fried your laptop” – contrary to popular belief, not everyone owns (or wants) a MacBook. This way your article would be more inclusive for everyone.
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Whaaa, I want a MacBook !!!
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HAHAHA, this is great and I recognize so much of it! I haven’t had the altiplano excuses for dysfunctional internet connections and I think I did see one or two Mc Donalds in my 5 months there. I actually thought that was great!
And yes, for a split second I thought I had fried my MacBook too! : )
More living and volunteering in Bolivia on my Blog:
http://www.uvolunteer.org/volunteer-life/category/bolivia/↵ -
Very cool post, Hal. I especially like the part about the chola falling asleep on you. I can relate to that from Ecuador. Say what you want, but there are so many things you suddenly miss that were more just along the lines of “funny to have been there” moments once you leave.
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If I remember right, there was a McDonal’s in La Paz – note the missing “D” – that was back in 1991, when I was in La Paz after graduating from high school. The long arm of corporate American trademark protection might have gotten stronger in the almost 20 years since I was in Bolivia.
I have to say I haven’t been back as an adult, but for a high school kid from Pennsylvania, Bolivia blew me away. It was completely different than anything I had ever seen, or even heard of. I stayed with a family at the time, for 7 weeks, and the one thing I’m not sure if your article captures is how friendly and welcoming so many people there are.
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You’re absolutely right on both points. I believe there was an actual official McD’s (whatever the spelling) in La Paz up until 2002 or so, when they scaled back their presence in some of the world’s poorer countries.
And yes, on the whole, Bolivian people very welcoming–even (or especially) in the middle of nowhere.
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